Cellar Ghosts

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That being said, who cares if someone is mean to Paris Hilton? In her case, I think being “mean” is falling short of the social contract. She’s built an empire on celebrating exclusion, aggressive ignorance, pettiness…and meanness.

Not only do I think everyone should be “mean” to Paris Hilton, but I think she should contract a terminal, painless bloating disease that can only be cured if the sufferer can both read and comprehend any written work by Willa Cather, Charles Portis, Wallace Stevens or Roberto Bolano.

She’d be doomed, but she’d die oblivious and we’ll all be entertained (and enriched) by her failed attempts to save her own life.

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